Vannin' Home Forums General Discussion Off Topic Dr. Bob's Jokes Thread

Someone told UncleBob some of his jokes were a little to X-rated and he said he wasn't going to post them anymore...I agreed some of them were to far out there but I wish he was still posting cleaner ones....was fun to read and sometimes join in...

Sure, just start one. There is no way to get the old one back as they are automatically deleted by the system after 30 days of inactivity.

why doesnt someone rename this one and we use it ?
id be happy to take all the credit lol

Teacher: "Little Johnny, give me a sentence using the word, 'geometry.'"

Little Johnny: "A little acorn grew and grew until it finally awoke one day and said, 'Gee, I'm a tree.'"

Frscke1:Jonny how old are you?
Jonny: 12
Frscke1: Did that joke offend you?
Jonny: NO
Frscke1: Jonny would you like to read some more Vanner jokes?
Jonny: You bet
Frscke1: Jonny are you going to call the cops?
Jonny No way Vanners are cool

I used that joke thread as a Library.

Sorry to see it go.

One of them went like this:

Two dimwitted brothers were putting the siding on a house.
One takes a smoke break watching the other one work.

The other brother is pulling one nail from his tool belt and driving it home, pulling out another one looking at it, and tossing it over his shoulder, another into the siding, another over his shoulder.

The one brother, perplexed at his brother's odd and wasteful behavior struts up to this obvious dimwit and asks why he is throwing half the nails over his shoulder.

"The pointy sides were on the wrong end!"

"You Idiot!!!!!!"
" Those are for the other side of the house!!!!!"

Did ya hear the one 'bout the horse that walks into the bar sits down and orders a beer?

Bartenders says Why the long face..........

The CIA had an opening for an assassin. After all of the background checks, interviews, and testing were done there were three finalists; two men and a woman.
For the final test, the CIA agents took one of the men to a large metal door and handed him a gun.
"We must know that you will follow your instructions, no matter what the circumstances. Inside this room, you will find your wife sitting in a chair. Kill her!"
The man said, "You can't be serious. I could never shoot my wife."
The agent said, "Then you're not the right man for this job."
The second man was given the same instructions. He took the gun and went into the room. All was quiet for about five minutes. Then the man came out with tears in his eyes. "I tried, but I can't kill my wife."
The agent said, "You don't have what it takes. Take your wife and go home."
Finally, it was the woman's turn. She was given the same instructions to kill her husband. She took the gun and went into the room.
Shots were heard, one shot after another. The agents heard screaming, crashing, and banging on the walls. After a few minutes, all was quiet. The door opened slowly and there stood the woman.
She wiped the sweat from her brow, and said, "Some idiot loaded this gun with blanks! I had to beat him to death with the chair."