I had just received my concealed weapon permit in the mail, so I went over to my local Bass Pro Shop to purchase a small 9mm handgun. When I was ready to pay for the gun and bullets, the cashier said "Strip down, facing me".
Making a mental note to complain to the NRA about the gun control wackos running amok, I did just as she instructed. When the hysterical shrieking and alarms finally subsided, I found out she was referring to how I should place my credit card in the card reader.
I've been asked to shop elsewhere in the future. They really need to make instructions to seniors a bit clearer.