A Catholic priest was doing confessions one afternoon and had to relieve himself in the middle of one rather long winded lady telling him of the sins of her week, So not wanting to disrupt her confession he peeks out and finds the Church janitor doing his mopping and motions him near. "What do you need preacher?" "Can you just sit in here and listen to her while I go to the restroom, if she finishes before I return it's nothing too serious so give her 3 hail Marys and she's good to go."

The janitor says sure and the priest goes to relieve himself. The lady goes on and on and finally admits to having oral relations with a neighbor man when her husband was at work. Not knowing what to make of this the janitor sticks his head out to look for the priest and sees an alter boy so he calls him over and asks, "What does the priest give for oral sex?"

The boy says, "$5 and a candy bar"

The 1980 Dodge B-series van that brought me here. It sat untouched in a garage since 1989! I sold it back to the very same guy who drove it 30 years ago for Mobile radio. Sometimes you just have to put a van where it belongs. Glad to see her getting the love it deserves.
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