How do you make old ladies say "funk"?
By yelling bingo.

One day an old man and his wife were sitting in their rockers. The old man reached over and grab his wife's breast and said, "If these produced milk, we could get rid of the cow." Then he reached down and grabbed between her legs and said, "If this was a little warmer, we wouldn't need the furnace." The old woman reached over and grabbed his Richard and said, "If this was a little harder, I wouldn't need your brother."

Gone vannin' I'll call you later.